Tis the season for lists. Whether you have an errands app on your phone or prefer tried-and-true paper and pen, there’s a lot to keep track of this time of year. I utilize all kinds of to-do lists (I have an Excel document for work in addition to an app on my phone for some personal errands while also making liberal use of the backs of envelopes). Sometimes, though, I can be a bit too “tasky.”
A few years ago, I was in a meeting with an intern at my church and I sensed something was bothering her. Instead of asking her about it, though, I plowed through the list I had for her. She stopped me. “Today, I just need you to listen to me!” I was cut to the core. She didn’t need a stereotypical supervisor that day. She needed a listening ear. Thankfully, the Spirit gave me the wherewithal to set aside the list and it turned into the best weekly meeting we had during her internship. She shared more of her story, she explained the struggles she was going through, she voiced the dreams she had. I simply listened and it totally transformed the way I have meetings with people.
Now, before I get to the task at hand, I always check in with him or her. And not just a cursory, “How are things going?” as my mind moves ahead to the first item on my agenda. I do my best to hear something that I didn’t know about this person’s story. It has made a huge difference in my ministry and in my interpersonal relationships.
The story of Mary and Martha is a classic one when it comes to busy-ness and to-do lists. I have read many defenses of Martha in recent years. Indeed, the world needs people who get things done. Jesus loved Martha, too. But he was also clear: Mary has chosen the better way. Before we put our lives into action, we need to sit with Jesus, do our best to be silent and listen, and simply be in his presence. May this be the first thing on our list during this Advent season.