I’ve been reading a lot of texts this week about welcoming the stranger and I went with this theme in the children’s sermon I gave on Christmas Eve wherein I put figurines and action figures (like Chewbacca) in a creche set. These are odd figures, yes? Should they be welcomed into this scene? I’m not sure it’s a terribly original idea, but it usually gets the kids’ attention.

Welcoming the stranger always sounds great. One can read Jeremiah 7:5-7 (“For if you truly amend your ways and your doings, if you truly act justly one with another, if you do not oppress the alien, the orphan, and the widow, or shed innocent blood in this place, and if you do not go after other gods to your own hurt, then I will dwell with you in this place, in the land that I gave of old to your ancestors forever and ever”) and be inspired by this and say, Yes! Bring on the strangers and aliens (another translation says “immigrants”) and orphans and widows! 

But here’s the problem. The stranger isn’t always nice.

I hear this from time to time from well-meaning folks who volunteer to help the homeless. The volunteers have an altruistic urge and want to feel good about themselves, but sometimes those they are welcoming aren’t necessarily falling over themselves with gratitude. Shouldn’t these darn homeless people be thankful that I’m taking time for them? I don’t hear this a lot and before I pass any judgment, if I’m honest with myself, I admit that I fall into this trap myself.

I was walking south on Wabash Avenue a few weeks ago in my neighborhood when a man approached, starting walking beside me, and asked for a quarter. I don’t usually give money to folks who ask for it, but, it just so happened, I had a quarter in my pocket. I stopped and, probably with not the most compassionate look on my face, I gave him the quarter. He then started asking for more, saying he wanted something to eat. For some reason, this touched a nerve. “But you asked for a quarter and I just gave you a quarter,” I said. He started arguing with me and I said I’d be happy take it back and he walked away, swearing at me under his breath. My first reaction was gall  (I gave him what he asked for!) and then embarrassment. Yes, I gave him what he asked for. A whopping twenty-five cents. I wanted him to thank me for this (sarcasm alert) generous gift I had bestowed. He hadn’t. I was put out. Not a great moment for me.

The stranger is sometimes rude and ungrateful. So is the neighbor. So am I. It’s part of the human condition as is being hungry, desiring connection, and seeking meaning. We don’t always get it right, but grace means we get more chances. Even when the stranger growls like Chewbacca and even when I growl right back.