My daughter is playing softball this spring so those hours of playing various games of hitting the tennis ball with instruments (rackets, bats, light sabers) may be paying off. It was interesting watching her in a game the other day, though. When we’re playing behind our townhouse, she has a nice swing and takes a good hack at it. During the game, however, she seemed tentative and took what essentially was a half swing. I was a bit puzzled by that, but I think I can relate. It can be intimidating standing there facing a pitcher because you don’t want to strike out. I felt that way when I was 10 years old and it has carried with me today.
We talk all the time at Urban Village about being bold, messy, authentic. And yet too often I don’t live into that. I don’t want to fail. I don’t want to make mistakes. I have expectations that I feel like I have to live up to and that can bring about stress and anxiety.
That’s why I was inspired once again by the story of the widow in Luke 21:1-4. Jesus is sitting in the temple watching the wealthy and powerful give money to the religious structures. And then along comes this older woman and plunks in two coins. Surely a few people scoffed at her or groaned at the inconvenience of fishing out those coins. As I was meditating on this story, however, I imagined that she put in one coin. Clink! And then when she heard the groans, she smiled in defiance and then dropped the second coin as if to say, I am putting myself in here, regardless of what you think. Jesus loved this.
When you fully put yourself into your own life, you will fail, groups will groan, people will think you’re an inconvenience. When that happens, smile, and defiantly put in your second coin. Jesus will love it.